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Friday, November 13th, 2009
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College is coming to an end. There are 5 weeks left (maybe 4?) and I just have one more paper to write. Just one. It's a 12-15 page research paper, and I'm finding it very difficult to find the motivation to do the research. The thing is, I'm a good enough writer to where I can still get a passing grade by half assing it, and I've come to the point where I just don't care about getting an A anymore. I half assed my first paper and got an A- (though, to be fair, that was MUCH easier than this one). That means I can get a lower grade (let's say, a C-) on my final paper and still get a B or B- in the class. I'd be happy with that. Hell, I'm fine with a C. Just give me my degree and kick me out the door.
I do need to do SOME research, though... Shit, I gotta fill 12 pages.
For a long time I've been planning on going overseas and teaching English once I graduate. Vacationing is fun and all, but to me, there's nothing more enticing than living someplace else. There are things you can get out of it that you miss while on vacation. Studying in Sweden was the best year of my life, not just because I got to live basically carefree, party, meet new people, etc., but because I learned so much more about myself. I've tried to even explain it to myself, but it's difficult to put into words. I left for Sweden an insecure, awkward kid and came back a self-assured man who is genuinely happy with myself, with who I am.
Sweden is one thing. In some ways I had to grow up and adapt to my new surroundings, but in other ways it's more comfortable living in Sweden than it is here. I was looking into the JET Programme or perhaps finding a program to teach English in South Korea, China, Vietnam, Indonesia, somewhere around there, but I want to go somewhere I'll be completely out of my element. I want to be challenged. I've been looking at the Peace Corps, and in particular their English teaching programs in central Asia. I don't know why, but they're calling out to me. Peace Corps goes to three countries in central Asia, Turkmenistan, Kyrgyzstan, and Kazakhstan. Mongolia is another country that really interests me. I read a blog entry about a guy who volunteered in Mongolia. He wrote about how he'd wake up in the morning and his night time fire would be out. He'd have to get up in his ger (tent), in freezing cold temperatures, and start a new fire, warming himself while he drank his coffee or tea. In his words: "I love working with Mongolians, but the time of day I look forward to most is building my morning fire. It is my time of epiphany. As I feel the warmth that my own hands created, a fire that pushes back the cold and the dark, replacing them with warmth and light, I know I will live another day."
I am inspired.
I feel if I don't apply, I will regret it for the rest of my life. I have no control of whether or not I'll be chosen, but I can apply, and I can work hard to make my application stand out so I can be chosen as a Peace Corps volunteer. That's something that can give me motivation.
For her part, Elin completely supports me. She knows I'd be there for 27 months, and it would be difficult to visit. Although I would get vacation time (24 days per year), I'd have little money to go anywhere, and flying to wherever I end up would likely be quite expensive. If I had to guess, I'd say we'd see each other once, for 3-4 weeks, the entire 27 months I was there. We talked about it, and she'd actually be excited for me to go. She even said "I hope you don't go to Mongolia and live in one of those tents, 'cause I'd be jealous." Hahaha. Over the past 2 or 3 months, I've really come to appreciate her even more. Even though we live half a world away, we have a wonderful relationship.
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Saturday, August 29th, 2009
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| Time: | 5:08 am. |
| Mood: |  annoyed. |
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I finally went to bed early last night (by "early" I mean 10:30). I thought I may be getting somewhere. Maybe I was getting back to a more "normal" sleep schedule. Then I woke up at 3:30. For no reason.
Now it's 5 in the morning. Chelsea vs. Burnley is being aired live on ESPN, so I've got the TV on, but I don't really care about this game. There are three much more interesting games later, games I may very well be asleep during now thanks to waking up at this odd hour.
The MegaMillions jackpot was ridiculous. $333 million. I don't think I could spend that much money in my lifetime if I tried. I wouldn't mind being given that task, though.
I really wish I was sleeping.
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Wednesday, August 26th, 2009
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"Naturally, the common people don't want war; neither in Russia nor in England nor in America, nor for that matter in Germany. That is understood. But, after all, it is the leaders of the country who determine the policy and it is always a simple matter to drag the people along, whether it is a democracy or a fascist dictatorship or a Parliament or a Communist dictatorship. ...voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is to tell them they are being attacked, and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same way in any country."--Hermann Göring
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Wednesday, July 22nd, 2009
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I wrote my experience attending a World Cup qualifier (Costa Rica vs. United States) a while ago on a message board, but wanted to document it here...
I meant to write this earlier, but I´ve been busy. Still traveling around Costa Rica. I´m in the north right now (La Fortuna, right next to Arenal volcano) and it is POURING! Never seen rain like this. Guess that´s what happens in a rainforest. :)
But it was beautiful in San Jose two nights ago. I was worried that it would rain. It had started to rain while I ate downtown 5 hours or so before the game. When I got to the stadium, 3 and a half hours before game time, storm clouds were rolling in. They decided to go away, however, and the weather could not have been better for a soccer game.
I saw some white dudes drinking beer outside of the entrance gate. I figured they were Americans, so I went and chatted with them for a while. Grabbed some beers. Drank. More Americans showed up and we had a little crew chilling in the street. Some Costa Ricans, both fans and street vendors, gave us some friendly shit talk.
Security at the stadium was great. Not pushy, but well-organized. Everyone was required to get rid of their coins in their pockets so no one could throw them at players (or other fans), and I believe the money was donated to some charity.
I loved the stadium. Yeah, it´s old and worn down, but what a great layout. There are no shitty corner seats. You´re either behind the goal or on the sideline. I found some people waving American flags at the very top of the stands (which were just concrete bleachers), so I went to join them. Interestingly, two of them, both wearing US jerseys and waving a giant US flag, were Ticos. Never found out why they were cheering for the US...
While the layout is great, the stadium itself is in disrepair. Some of the concrete steps actually wobble a bit, and the steps are HUGE. As everyone knows, the atmosphere is great, however. Fans are right on top of the action. I think the new stadium being built will be multi-purpose, with a running track around the stadium, separating fans from the field. While this will be better for visiting teams, it seems like it will put a damper on the atmosphere.
But not too much. The fans are incredible. They are loud, patriotic, singing, chanting... and considerate. They showed us no hostility (not in my area, anyway) and even seemed welcoming. It actually seemed like they enjoyed having us there to root against.
We represented well, I thought. We ended up drawing a decent crowd of Americans in our area, with several big flags. We got the "U-S-A" chant going several times, and then were quickly drowned out by the Ticos singing songs to shut us up. The songs spread quickly throughout the entire stadium, with one side behind the goal bouncing up and down like maniacs. Some people in our area were bouncing too, making the stands shake. This was a good 90 minutes before game time, and lasted all the way until the game started. Or, until the first 2 minutes. We got a bit quieter after that--and then even quieter about 10 minutes later.
The Costa Rican fans had a chant (one of the many): "Oleeeeeeee, ole ole ole oleeee, Ticooooooos, Ticooooos" We decided to adopt the chant, but couldn´t quite figure out what to replace Ticos with. We tried Estados Unidos--too much of a mouthful. We tried USA--didn´t sound right. Then someone--I don´t know who--came up with a great one. "Oleeeeeeeee, ole ole oleeeee, Gringoooooooos, Gringoooooos" Even the Costa Ricans around us liked it. I saw several of them turn to us and laugh. Of course, they then drowned us out.
I saw several Americans behind the goal, representing in the middle of a sea of Costa Ricans. Three in particular were wearing USA flags wrapped around their backs and skipping up and down in front of the front row. Back and forth. Back and forth. I saw some American flags on the other sideline, too.
When Gooch got fouled in the box at the end of the game, we waved the flag like maniacs and started the "U-S-A" chant. Hey, we had to cheer for something, right? It was also quite sarcastic. I mean, we knew we got our asses kicked and had no chance of evening the score, but we took our one chance during the game to celebrate. Why not? Some of the Ticos looked at us like we were idiots and held up three fingers, but we didn´t care.
Not much interesting happened after the game. I ran into some other Americans, and we remarked how far our country has come when it comes to soccer. One guy asked "How many Americans were here for the qualifier 20 years ago?" I answered "Maybe five." He replied "Yeah, and all five were probably friends and family." Yeah, we lost. We were expected to lose. We played even worse than expected. But the experience was magnificent, and it was a good sign for US soccer to see so many Americans at the game. No, we still don´t travel like English fans, but compared to 20, or even 10 years ago, I think it´s a positive sign.
Now I need to attend a home qualifier...
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Sunday, February 8th, 2009
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I haven't posted in here in forever, and I don't know if anyone will read this, but I have to write this down.
My professor is a hero.
I am taking a very difficult class, basically a senior project class for history students. I have to write a 25 page research paper. I've never written anything over 10 pages. Safe to say, I am intimidated and overwhelmed.
My professor is Paul Longmore. On the first day of class, he wheeled in on a motorized wheelchair. Obvious spine curviture, can't move his arms, and has to use a breathing tube. I have to admit I was a little put off at first. Throughout the first two class sessions, he has proven to be a humorous, understanding, and extremely intelligent person. I'm still freaking out about doing this essay, but he has made me feel more comfortable with it. He has been quite helpful. Very helpful.
I decided to do a Google search on him. I came across some things which have blown my mind. He has written an award-winning book called Why I Burned My Book and Other Essays on Disability. He writes articles for newspapers on disability rights. And he is a political activist. "In 1988, Longmore lit a match to his book on George Washington in front of the Social Security Administration's offices in Los Angeles as a protest to policies that penalized disabled professionals for earning money through education, fellowships and grants. The Longmore Amendment was established soon after, allowing disabled authors to count publishing royalties as earned income."
This has made me motivated to do well in the class. At the same time, it has also intimidated me even more.
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Wednesday, November 21st, 2007
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| Time: | 4:38 am. |
| Mood: |  disappointed. |
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They say "It's a small world." I say "Bullshit."
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Sunday, November 18th, 2007
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I came home from a fun party in the city center at about 3 am. Sanna (Swedish girl) and Kate (the lovely Polish girl) were both cooking. Eventually, Sanna went to bed, leaving Kate and I in the kitchen. Kate usually doesn't like to talk about her feelings or anything (she's like a block of ice usually), but she started saying all kinds of nice shit, topping it off with "I'm really glad I met you" and then a kiss. She also promised to cook for me tonight. Jesus Christ! Just 2 days ago, she would barely say hi to me. I swear, this girl is fucking with me.
I went to Stockholm yesterday for the day. There was a skiing and snowboarding big air competition in Stockholm Stadium, and as an added bonus they had a BMX exhibition in between. It was a lot of fun. free entrance, too. Getting something for free in Sweden is like finding gold, so we couldn't pass this up. Only problem was that it was extremely fucking cold. None of us could feel our feet by 8, so we decided to leave before it finished. Oh, and on the way back, some incompetent employee sold me a train ticket back to Uppsala for 50 öre (half of a crown), which is... *does calculation* 8 cents. 8 cents! Holy shit! Cheapest train ticket EVER. It's usually 61 crowns to go between Stockholm and Uppsala (one way), which is almost $10. Talk about lucky.
Tomorrow my next history class begins... finally. And then on Wednesday, I leave for Russia. Yeeeeeeah!
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Monday, November 12th, 2007
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I have pretty much neglected this journal for a while now. I guess I've been lost in a whirlwind of partying and adjusting to a new lifestyle. My first two months here were two of the best months of my life. I've been able to meet so many people from so many different countries. So many different perspectives, such different cultures. I feel lucky to experience something like this. Living in a new country and living in a city with such an incredible international atmosphere.
However, the vacation phase is over. Now it's just ordinary life again, but in a new setting halfway around the world. I still love it here, but the ecstatic feeling has left. I feel more grown up already. Away from everyone I've ever known, having to sustain myself (with financial support from my dad though, of course), learning to cook, shaping social relations in unfamiliar settings, etc. Maybe I never realized how important my dad and my friends are to me. Now that it's ordinary life again, my overly analytical mind is back running in top gear, and when I get to thinking about past regrets or anything else negative, I find it difficult to express myself to people I've known for such a short amount of time. Last week, there was one night that I just went crazy, pacing back and forth, walking to the (shared) kitchen to find something to eat, or maybe just for some company. I took a walk in the sub-zero (Celsius) temperature and smoked a cigarette, freezing my ass off, walking aimlessly like a mad man. I finally remembered Melissa's number, the only number from home I remember, and called her. A 5 minute chat with her calmed me down. I guess I was just homesick.
There is a beautiful Polish girl who lives right across the corridor from me. She has so many of the qualities (positive AND negative) that are so attractive to me. Fiery and competitive, completely crazy and troubled, stubborn, intelligent, adventurous, loves to travel, and even trains martial arts (capoeira) and likes boxing and MMA. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately), she just won't open up except for brief moments, and continually keeps me at arm's length. We haven't messed around for about 2 weeks, and I've decided I want to keep it that way. My mind has cleared a bit and my hopes aren't as high. If we do hook up again, it'll likely make me want to chase her again. It's probably better this way.
I can't help but feeling, for the first time in my life, I would actually welcome a relationship due to the reason NOT being loneliness, but rather due to the fact that I actually feel ready for it. Feels strange.
The streets have frozen. Ice makes it difficult, and fun, to walk and bike. It's an adventure. Carrying my bike home while drunk because the lock froze was a new experience for me. It snowed like crazy on Friday night. It was a great night, sitting inside a bar chatting with friends and watching the snow fall, then biking home with snow blowing in my face and my bike sliding on the streets. The snow is melting away now, but it'll be back soon, I'm sure. I love living in the snow. The darkness has been more difficult to adjust to than I expected. It's dark at 3:30, and REALLY DARK by 5. I can't help but feel tired as hell by 6. My body's not used to darkness this early and tells me to get ready for bed earlier than usual.
I've done some traveling so far. Tallinn, Estonia and Copenhagen, Denmark are two amazing cities. I could go on and on about how great these vacations have been, but I'll just say to anyone who may be reading this, if you get the chance, go to Tallinn and Copenhagen. Next Wednesday, I leave for Russia. A week long trip where I will visit St. Petersburg and Moscow. Considering St. Petersburg was the #1 city I wanted to visit while I studied here, I am fucking stoked. I'm counting the days.
Tomorrow there is a pub crawl capped off by club night (Snerikes on Tuesday nights, always). I'm sure I will be sloppy drunk, and maybe I'll have to carry my bike home again. Alcohol is ridiculously expensive here, and yet I've never drank some so much in my life as I have while here. It's a European thing, I guess.
I'm still looking for the place I will make my life someday. California isn't it. Sweden isn't it. I like both, but couldn't imagine living out the rest of my life in either place. Maybe once I graduate, I will fulfill my childhood dream of teaching English and living in Japan. Maybe then I'll find my home. Meanwhile, I will enjoy the journey.
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Saturday, July 14th, 2007
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You know, I generally don't even like romance movies, but Before Sunrise and Before Sunset are absolutely incredible. Before Sunset especially. It's one of my all time favorite films.
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Thursday, July 12th, 2007
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| Subject: | Insomnia |
| Time: | 3:59 am. |
| Mood: | restless. | | Music: | Propagandhi - "Bringer of Greater Things". |
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Summer completely fucks my sleep pattern. It happens every year. I swear it's the heat. I can't sleep when I'm sweating my ass off. Despite that, it hadn't gotten too bad until today. I can handle waking up before noon. When I looked at my clock upon waking up today, the damn thing said 1:46. FUCK! That gave me a whopping 3 hours of free time before work.
Of course, in addition to the heat, the fact that I'm not forced to wake up any time before 4 pm doesn't exactly help matters.
But I enjoy having a normal sleep schedule. And every summer, it deteriorates into me doing this at 4 in the morning... That is, not a fucking thing. By the time it gets this late, I can't even read, because my mind just doesn't absorb the words on the page. I've been watching fights all day, and I'm a little burned out. I could watch a movie, but I don't have the patience to sit through a 2 hour movie at 4 in the morning. So I sit at my computer, surfing the same sites over and over and over. I'm pretty much never bored... except for the middle of the night during summer.
When's school starting again? Six weeks? Shit.
I remember one summer I would go to bed at 7 am and wake up at 7 pm. Ugh.
Should I ramble on a little more? I certainly have nothing else to do, so fuck it, I'm-a ramble.
I walked into work today and tried to strike up a conversation about the MLB All Star Game. The infield double and inside the park home run were pretty cool, but no one knew about them. Then one of my co-workers remarked that I'm always informed on everything going on in the sports world. Hmmmm... Never thought of it that way, but it could be true. I started to reply that I know a lot about a lot, and then remembered I stopped following current events a few months ago. I don't know much of anything that's going on anymore. All the headlines about the Iraq war bored me to tears--seriously, how many different articles can they write about the same thing with really nothing new happening--and I guess pushed me toward something more interesting. I guess that new thing is sports. And reading.
I started reading a book called Genghis Khan and the Making of the Modern World. Only two chapters into it, but I'm loving it. The Mongols are so damn interesting, but we're never taught much about them except that they fucked up a lot of people and had the largest land empire in world history. So I decided to learn more. How Genghis Khan rose from a shitty tragedy-filled and hopeless childhood into the great conqueror he became is remarkable. I haven't even gotten to the point where he has become Genghis Khan (he's still Temujin, son of Yesugei), and it's already amazing.
Is that enough of an update? I guess I was due for a long entry, considering I've updated this like 5 times in 5 months. I don't know if those stats are accurate, but they gotta be close.
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OK, so I love Pixar. Who doesn't? They consistently make the best animated movies. I also love Brad Bird. Perhaps not as well known, but he's now made three films: The Iron Giant, The Incredibles, and Ratatouille. I loved the first two; in fact, they are my two favorite animated movies. So Bird and Pixar together again for the second time... I knew I had to see Ratatouille.
I haven't been going to the movies much in the past year or so, so maybe my opinion doesn't mean much, but this is one of the best I've seen in a loooooong time. The only other two I can think of that can be considered are Children of Men and V for Vendetta. Ratatouille actually lacks a lot of the humor that are in most Pixar movies, but the story, the animation, the characters are so amazing that it doesn't matter. And the monologue at the end is just jaw-dropping; it's surprisingly profound. I don't even like Peter O'Toole, but he delivers it absolutely perfectly.
( Monologue behind a cut so anyone who wants to can avoid spoilers )
What an awesome movie.
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Comments: Read 6 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, June 27th, 2007
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| Subject: | Fresno |
| Time: | 1:00 am. |
| Mood: |  nostalgic. | | Music: | Spacehog - "In the Meantime". |
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I was driving home from the Tower District, in south Fresno, where I had spent the night bar hopping with my friends, back to north Fresno where I live. While driving through Fresno, I realized how much I like this city. Sure, there are things I don't like, such as the fucking weather. But this is home. While driving home, many memories flashed through my head, good and bad. The stupid shit I did as a teenager. The pick up football and soccer games I played with my friends as a pre-teen, especially with Matt and Kevin. (I'm reminded of the final line in Stand by Me: "I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was twelve. Jesus, does anyone?") The floor, right next to where I now sit, where I made love to Amber for the first time. The time I got pulled over with open containers in the car. Getting a flat tire while at a porn shop. Jiu-jitsu. My mom. Damn near every memory from the first 22 years of my life.
More than likely, I will never again live here, at least not for more than a summer. But I will always come back. It's where I feel safe; it's home.
That said, I got my residence permit in the mail and I can't fucking wait to leave for Sweden. Plane departs from San Jose on August 16!
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| Subject: | summer |
| Time: | 2:41 pm. |
| Mood: |  lazy. | | Music: | Desaparecidos - "The Happiest Place on Earth". |
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Summertiiiime, and the livin's easy.
I got a job for the summer, once again delivering pizzas. Having not worked for 9 months, getting back into the mindset of slaving away is pretty difficult. Every day before I have to go to work, I'm like "Fuck, I really don't wanna go." I used to enjoy working. But hey, I only have to work for 2 months, and that's it until next summer (probably).
It's amazing how lazy I've gotten since school ended. Maybe it's the heat. I've been lounging around the house in my boxers all day, doing absolutely nothing productive. I meant to read a lot this summer, but once it started getting hotter, I began reading less. I finished a book my first week back, and I've been stuck on halfway through book #2 pretty much ever since.
Tomorrow, my dad goes to the doctor to have all of the rest of his teeth pulled. All of them! Crazy that his teeth suck so bad because I've never had a single problem with mine. No cavities, no braces, nothing. I have to drive him to and from there, and I have to stay in the waiting room for the entire process. I guess there's my chance to get back into reading, eh?
The bureaucratic BS for studying abroad is STILL not completed. I thought I had finally finished it. Bought my plane ticket (I leave August 16, arriving August 17 at noon in Stockholm) and mailed in my residence permit application (basically, it's a visa application). But I just got an email from the Consulate General of Sweden office saying "We need a letter from SFSU stating that you will take part in an exchange program with Uppsala University during the time indicated in your application form. Pls email to me asap." Fucking hell. It just won't end! I called SFSU and left a message.
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| Time: | 1:37 pm. |
| Mood: |  stressed. |
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Today is Jackie Robinson Day. Respect.
I have the worst case of athlete's foot ever. I think it's infected. Half of my foot is red and extremely painful. It feels like a bad bruise and I'm limping everywhere I go.
In my History and Literature of Baseball class, we have to read a book called The Glory of Their Times. It's amazing. A guy went around in the 1960s and interviewed old school ballplayers from the first 3-4 decades of the 20th century, then wrote a chapter for each in their own words. At the beginning of each chapter, the author quotes something, usually referencing the player interviewed in the chapter. One of the players is named Willie Kamm. He was sold by the semipro San Francisco Seals to the Chicago White Sox in the major leagues for a then-record sum of $100,000. The quote for Kamm's chapter is a poem a Seals fan wrote him when he/she found out Kamm had been sold.
Now Mister Willie Kamm, you don't know who I am,
But that needn't make a bit of diff to you,
For I'm just a common fan, tho' I do the best I can,
And I always root for everything you do.
I like to see you play, in that easy graceful way,
Which doesn't seem to bother you at all,
If a batter pops a fly, way up high into the sky,
It's a cinch that batter's out, and that is all.
When you swing that ashen stick, very hard and very quick,
And the ball lands in the bleachers for a tally,
Or when it's hit-and-run, right there begins the fun,
For I know it's gonna start a winning rally.
Now it's no make-believe that we hate to see you leave,
For we'll miss you, yes we'll miss you every day,
For we like you, Willie boy, and it takes away our joy,
Just to think that we'll no longer see you play.
It's hard to say good-bye, and I feel as tho I'll cry,
Notwithstanding that the best of friends must part,
So wherever you do play, in that easy graceful way,
You will always have a warm place in my heart.
--Just an Ordinary Fan (84 years old)
On the note of school, I'm burnt out. So burnt out. Even though I've been having a blast this semester, the amount of schoolwork is getting to me. Correction: It has already gotten to me. I feel like I've been in an endless cycle of reading and writing for the past 3 months. I need a break. Even during spring break, I've been reading and writing. I want to relax and watch baseball games and fights and read the books that interest me. (Although some of my assigned reading this semester has been fantastic; others have been dreadful.) Five more weeks of hell, and then the sun comes out.
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Wednesday, April 11th, 2007
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On Easter Sunday, my dad and I had dinner with my aunt, uncle, and their two daughters. My uncle is from Chile, so I decided to ask him how old he was when Pinochet took power. He said he was 13. Then told me he entered the army at 17 and eventually ended up in the secret service and became a guard at Pinochet's house for about a year! Whoa. He showed me some pics of him doing special forces training and shaking Pinochet's hand. Crazy.
This morning, I was watching Sportscenter. They did a piece on Jackie Robinson. Who do I see getting interviewed about him? None other than my history of baseball professor, who has written a couple books about Robinson. Weird seeing my teacher on Sportscenter.
Driving home from SF today, a guy in front of me absolutely nailed a dog on the road. The dog's bouncing carcass came careening at me, and I had to swerve to miss it. No more than a minute later, I drove past a house horribly on fire. I'm talking something out of Backdraft or Ladder 49 or something. Flames flying out of every window. I've seen fires while driving, but nothing like that.
Now I'm in Fresno for the rest of Spring Break. Oh, relaxation.
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Thursday, March 22nd, 2007
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Life has been crazy lately. Absolutely crazy. It's too much to go into, but suffice to say I'm having a lot of fun this semester, and also stressing out big time. I'm actually procrastinating right now. Ha!
The teachers' union has voted overwhelmingly to go on strike. Date seems to be early April. It's apparently a rolling strike, where they'll only strike for a couple days at a time. As long as I don't have to retake these classes again next semester, I'm fine with that, but I am worried that it's going to cause problems for the students.
That's all I really wanted to say.
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Comments: Read 5 or Add Your Own.
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Thursday, February 22nd, 2007
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I just had my study abroad interview. Intrestingly, my African history teacher was part of the panel. I don't even know if he recognized me. It was a short interview, and I have no idea how I did. I'll find out in early April...
Now I'm sitting in a suit and tie in the school library to update my LJ. Hah.
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Comments: Read 7 or Add Your Own.
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Monday, February 5th, 2007
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| Subject: | Bummin' it |
| Time: | 9:58 pm. |
| Mood: |  optimistic. | | Music: | Tom Waits - "Invitation to the Blues". |
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My roommates are moving out at the end of the month, meaning I have to leave too. And I can't go with them because I can't sign a lease since I'll be going back to Fresno for the summer and then (hopefully) to Sweden in the fall. I have family in the Bay Area, near San Jose and in the Pittsburg/Antioch area, but if I stayed with them that would mean I'd have to commute to school every day. Finding roommates for only 3 months would likely be difficult. As a joke, I remarked to myself that maybe I'll have to live out of my car for the rest of the semester.
wavesofapathy (9:27:19 PM): its funny, i originally thought of it as a joke, and then i sat and was like "holy shit, that would be awesome!"
moviekisses14 (9:29:08 PM): UM NO
wavesofapathy (9:29:11 PM): oh hell yeah
wavesofapathy (9:30:02 PM): i grew up in an upper middle class family and got everything i always ever fucking wanted...this is kind of a flawed experiment, seeing as how i have a car, laptop, and a comfortable amount of money in the bank, but im curious how i'll react to not having some of the luxuries i grew up with
moviekisses14 (9:35:35 PM): shower?
moviekisses14 (9:35:37 PM): pee?
moviekisses14 (9:35:38 PM): #2?
wavesofapathy (9:35:42 PM): lol...same questions my friends asked
wavesofapathy (9:35:55 PM): i'll probably park on campus and sleep there...and just use the school bathrooms
wavesofapathy (9:36:21 PM): shower... i have a PE locker, so if they have showers in the locker room i'll use those
wavesofapathy (9:36:39 PM): shaving might be tricky...i might have to do that in public bathrooms...hahahaha
wavesofapathy (9:37:05 PM): as for pee, im a dude...i can pee wherever the fuck i want
moviekisses14 (9:37:46 PM): true
moviekisses14 (9:37:47 PM): lol
wavesofapathy (9:38:53 PM): if they dont have showers in the locker room, i'll probably stay with family (in which case i'll have to commute)...thats pretty much the deciding factor right now
Moving on, I went to my first ever political rally last weekend. Not this past weekend, but the weekend before that. It was an anti-Iraq War march up Market Street and then down Embarcadero to Pier 31 and 33. Wasn't terribly exciting, but it was cool to experience, I reckon.
I am absolutely loving my classes. LOTS of reading to do, though. I have 23 books and approximately 300-500 pages per week.
Girl updates...
Haven't spoken to Amber since December. She sent me a couple messages on Myspace, and that's it. I've been feeling a lot better over the past 4-6 weeks, and I don't think that's a coincidence. Good riddance.
I walked by the girl I met at the wrestling meet in the Humanities building hallway last week. She hid her face from me as she walked past. I knew I had fucked up, but GOD DAMN!
Over break I had been talking to this very cute girl named Abby. We seemed to click, chats filled with laughter. The day before school started, we met up and hung out. She hasn't shown any interest in seeing me since, though we still chat on AIM. Not sure what happened there, but oh well.
Had a date last week with a girl I didn't give a damn about. She ended up inviting me to a party and we messed around. If only I went into every date not giving a shit...
Although really I'm not giving a shit at all finding a girlfriend anymore. Once the thing with Abby fell through I felt pretty content with that. I don't feel depressed or lonely anymore, the way I did at the end of last semester. School will be keeping me very busy anyway. And it looks like I've made some friends now to get my social life going. I'm feeling pretty damn good.
Oh, and it looks like I'll be going to Coachella at the end of April. Woohoo! Rage Against the Machine is performing for the first time since 2000, and I thought I'd never get a chance to see them live. I couldn't pass that up.
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, January 24th, 2007
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Notes from day 1...
-The Russian Cyrillic alphabet is ridiculously difficult. Even harder than learning the hiragana and katakana in Japanese. Probably because the characters were completely new, so I had no prior idea of what they sound like, but the Cyrillic alphabet uses some of the same characters as the English alphabet, but it's pronounced differently.
-My human sexuality teacher is funny. He warned the students to not only not hook up with the TAs, but to not hook up with HIM! Our class is in a huge lecture hall... He said, "If I hit on you somewhere, it's your responsibility to tell me you're my student. I have 500-700 students every semester, I can't recognize every one of you." He's openly gay, for the record, and mentioned he especially likes STRAIGHT men. The teacher is telling his class this on the first day. Only in San Francisco?
-South Africa has the most awesome constitution ever. It's completely egalitarian, which is crazy considering 15 years ago it was just about the most racist country on the planet.
-My history and literature of baseball class has TEN REQUIRED BOOKS! Holy shit! It's taught by 2 professors, one from the US History department and one from the English Literature department. That's pretty cool. Plus, the history teacher's first name is Jules. I wonder if he has a wallet that says Bad Motherfucker on it.
-Why is my loan check $1500 less than they told me it would be?
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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fearnotofman's journal
hungry.
peaceful.
hopeful.